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Hey This May Be Childhood Nostalgia

February 28, 2011
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I think that this is a better representation of childhood than most. I don’t know about you, but I throw up at the sight of giggly children in sailor suits, running through meadows like they’re being pursued by cuddly stuffed toys while on nitrous oxide. How dare those people be happier than me.

I think that children’s horror fiction is actually a lot scarier than adults. Less gruesome, yes. But since they shy away from the kind of overdirect hyper-sexualized blood gore-orgies that slasher films love so much. They actually have to rely on the reader’s imagination, which is kind of nice because it makes me feel slightly more involved in the book. I read a lot of Roald Dahl recently, and it’s almost shamefully pleasurable to watch the greedy pig-faced villains get their hilarious and just ends. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, for instance. Today people would shake their heads and talk about child neglect and Freudian excuses and poor parenting, but admit it: you feel justly vindicated when Augustus Gloop fell into the chocolate river, Fatheaded excuse for a human being he is – what a little bastard. The children invited to the chocolate factory are little more than two-dimensional hate magnets anyway, as deviously manufactured by Dahl like how the tooth rotting sweets are deviously manufactured by Willy Wonka. That doens’t really lessen the feeling of betrayal though, when you catch yourself cheering on the juicing process for a young girl who has just turned into a half-human and half-blueberry creature. Which now to think of it, sounds like the most perfect candidate ever for a haircut with Sweeney Todd. Dessert and entrée at once, mmm.

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